If a man and his partner do not think about how long the sexual intercourse will last, for them it really does not matter. For example, Ian Kerner, sex therapist, author of She Comes First, advises men to lead a sexual prelude in such a way that before the beginning of the sexual act the partner was already close to orgasm. In this case, the man's propensity to premature ejaculation will not matter, because both partners will be satisfied at the same time.
Conversely, if a man's time from the beginning of sexual intercourse to ejaculation is greater than usual, but both partners like prolonged sex, this can be considered an advantage.
Sometimes men think too much about how much time they need to ejaculate. But the psychological component plays not the least role in ejaculation disorders, so you need to look for the key to solving these problems. Here are some tips on how to do this.
The most common violations of ejaculation. There are three fundamentally different types of ejaculation disorders.
Premature ejaculation is the most common sexual disorder in men. According to statistics, every third man complains about this in the US. Such patients want to increase the duration of sexual intercourse, in order to prolong the pleasure for themselves and their partner.
Delay ejaculation (delayed ejaculation) occurs in a much smaller number of men - about 3%. This is one of the least studied types of ejaculation disorders. Some men generally can not reach orgasm.
Retrograde ejaculation is the least common. This sperm in the process of ejaculation falls into the bladder, and then is excreted during urination.
Retrograde ejaculation can be observed in diabetes mellitus, innervation disorders, the intake of various drugs, with sphincter injury during surgical intervention. This condition is not dangerous and does not affect sexual feelings, but it violates fertility. Therefore, if a couple wants to have a baby, a man needs treatment.
There are many reasons that can lead to a delay in ejaculation. Certain medications - for example, antidepressants, in some cases - age. The older the man, the less sensitive are the nerve endings of the penis. Also, with age, there may be erectile dysfunction, which makes ejaculation difficult.
The cause of this problem can also serve as masturbation. Some men become accustomed to this level of stimulation, which no partner can reproduce.
Michael Perelman, a sexologist and marriage counselor, says that sometimes to achieve the effect a man needs to stop masturbating. This will increase the sexual desire and reduce the threshold of excitation to achieve orgasm.
But masturbation can be not only the reason for the delay of ejaculation, but at the same time and the means of its treatment. If a man does not want to stop masturbating, Perelman advises changing the way of masturbation to break old habits.
Perelman suggests that men imagine sex with their partner during masturbation. In this case, the method of masturbation should be the most similar to the manual, oral and vaginal stimulation that a man receives from a woman during sexual intercourse. It may take a little longer, but the process of masturbation will be closer to sex. Perelman also suggests that men subsequently discuss their sexual fantasies with their partner.
How about a more common problem - premature ejaculation? In this case, masturbation gives a positive effect. Frequent repetition of orgasm can eventually lead to a later onset of ejaculation in most men. Some believe that the best way to cope with premature ejaculation is to double the number of orgasms a man experiences in a week. And if it does not help, double it again.
There is some evidence of the effectiveness of this folk method.
"Young men with a short refractory period (a period of reduced excitability coming in during and after their initiation) may have two or more controlled ejaculations in one sexual act," says Dr. Chris McMahon.
Masturbation can also give men the opportunity to understand what level of excitement they need to delay the onset of orgasm.
A time-tested way to cope with premature ejaculation is to distract yourself, that is, to think of something boring or even disgusting to delay the onset of orgasm. It can give a positive result, but this method psychologically distances a man from a partner and sexual intercourse.
There is an alternative means - to take a break in sex for a few minutes to delay orgasm; also helps compress the head of the penis.
Perelman advises men with premature ejaculation to take advantage of the techniques of Masters and Johnson. They mean slowing frictions during intercourse and changing the nature of the movements in such a way as to bring the partner maximum pleasure, while remaining in a state of erection, but not being excited too much.
Men who do not help the above methods, can recommend pharmaceuticals. Since antidepressants - selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors - are known as the cause of ejaculation delay, studies are being conducted to use them to treat premature ejaculation. If a man takes an antidepressant 4 to 6 hours before contact, ejaculation occurs later than usual.
Not surprisingly, pharmaceutical companies have adopted the results of these studies. The selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor of short-acting dapoxetine is designed specifically for the treatment of premature ejaculation. According to studies published in 2006, when taking the drug 3 hours before sex at a dose of 30 mg, the duration of the sexual intercourse increases from 1.75 minutes to 2.78 minutes, at a dose of 60 mg to 3.32 minutes.
Antihistamine preparation cyproheptadine and antiviral drug amantadine also have a moderate effect on the duration of sexual intercourse.
Instead of medical preparations, some men use anesthetic creams for this purpose. And the simplest method is to use two condoms at the same time to reduce sensitivity.
When ejaculation disorders should consult a specialist, because it can be a symptom of more serious health problems.
But we also need to talk openly with the partner - usually men try to avoid such conversations. "Usually men is difficult to discuss in detail questions about sex as a doctor, and with a partner," - says Perelman.
Do not let shame or male pride destroy your sex life. Do not let things go on their own - so you can only do harm. Openly discuss the situation with your partner, try new techniques of sex - and you can solve problems with ejaculation. The solution is: less stress and more sex.
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