Premature ejaculation

Which man is not able to control ejaculation?

Failure to control ejaculation is very depressing for men and can lead to unwanted pregnancy of a woman. Not only does a man feel awkward in front of a partner for his failure, but a woman also feels a feeling of dissatisfaction. On this basis, a man may develop sexual neurosis in the future.

The basis of premature ejaculation, according to K. Imelinsky, is the incorrect course of the sexual arousal reaction. This is manifested in the fact that unexpectedly there may be a state of increased sexual arousal, accompanied by premature ejaculation.

Under normal conditions, sexual arousal increases gradually, even in cases where the level of general arousal is very high.

With neurotic (that is, due to sexual neurosis) premature ejaculation, sexual arousal first increases gradually, although quite quickly, and then suddenly an unexpected “jump” of tension occurs, without preliminary precursors in the form of a gradual increase in arousal, usually preceding ejaculation.

Therefore, men suffering from premature ejaculation can neither anticipate the onset of ejaculation nor regulate it. It occurs suddenly, even if at the beginning it was preceded by a gradual increase in sexual arousal, which did not portend the approach of ejaculation.

In these cases, as with neurotic impotence, a paradoxical reaction is also observed. It lies in the fact that ejaculation occurs the sooner, this is the longer the man seeks to detain him.

With sexual neurosis, due to increased excitability, ejaculation occurs the faster, the weaker the erection at the beginning of sexual intercourse.

In men who do not suffer from this disorder, the opposite phenomenon is observed, that is, ejaculation occurs the faster, the stronger the erection (as an expression of significant sexual arousal) at the beginning of sexual intercourse.

Some men are depressed by the fact that even in erotic dreams, the fact of premature ejaculation also appears. Suspicious men interpret their dreams as evidence of the severity of their disorder. However, this is a normal, physiological phenomenon and occurs in most healthy men, in whom nightly emissions precede a sexual act seen in a dream.

Due to lack of awareness, men regard premature ejaculation as impotence. Although in reality it, in the opinion of K. Imelinsky, is “superpotency”, that is, an excess of excitability, while impotence is insufficient excitability.

K. Imelinsky believes that premature ejaculation is caused not only by high sexual excitability, lack of “training” and inability to prolong sexual intercourse, but also by a violation of interpersonal relationships with a partner and egocentrism manifested in the sexual sphere, that is, the sexual egoism of a man. This is manifested in insufficient caresses in relation to the partner, lack of attention to her feelings and desire to give her satisfaction, combined with the installation of a man to relieve his own sexual stress. Sexual satisfaction is achieved at the level of genital sensations (that is, sensations from contact of the genitals), and not on the desire to unite both partners.

That is, premature ejaculation is not a direct result of a high level of sexual arousal, as it is the result of an inability to have sexual contact with a partner.

With premature and early ejaculation due to sexual neurosis, K. Imelinsky distinguishes 2 phases.

The first phase is associated with increased sexual arousal, which is noted at a young age, after long periods of sexual abstinence, in the case of a very intense stimulating erotic influence of a partner or in the presence of her high sexual needs, but rare opportunities to satisfy them.

In all these cases, early and premature ejaculation depends on the imbalance between the degree of sexual arousal and the frequency of satisfaction of sexual needs. That is, they reflect the effect of too long sexual abstinence between two sexual intercourse.

In such cases, to regulate sexual activity, it is enough to establish a constant rhythm of sexual intercourse. In some cases, self-regulation occurs with decreasing sexual needs and sexual excitability associated with age (after 20 years, these needs decrease gradually, slowly, and after 30 years it is already more noticeable).

The second phase is associated with a neurotic reaction that overlays the first phase. Emotional tension (fear that sexual intercourse will fail again, fear of compromising oneself) causes even earlier ejaculation, increasing the tension associated with sexual arousal. Such states of tension can disturb the balance of the nervous system and thereby eliminate the influence of inhibitory mechanisms that could delay ejaculation. This, in turn, promotes too early ejaculation.

In this phase, there is also an excessive concentration of attention on the genitals and their functioning, which further accelerates ejaculation, since it is known that distraction from intercourse delays the onset of ejaculation.

All this causes an even earlier ejaculation than in the first phase. The early and premature appearance of ejaculation in this case not only means increased excitability, but is also a manifestation of a secondary neurotic reaction, which was stratified by the existing increased sexual excitability.

In these cases, the full restoration of sexual functions depends not only on creating a balance between sexual excitability and the frequency of sexual intercourse, but also on the presence of mental balance. A man can no longer cope with this on his own, and the help of a qualified sex therapist is required.

Most men, who are most afraid of impotence, experience a feeling of tension and fear in such a situation. Some, in order to “test” their potency, have repeated sexual intercourse too early, when normal sexual arousal has not yet been restored. Naturally, there is no sufficient erection. This further convinces the man that he allegedly suffers from impotence.

It also happens that to prevent early ejaculation, a man for a long time refrains from sexual intercourse. And as mentioned earlier, with prolonged abstinence, excitability increases, therefore, of course, a man will again fail if he fixes himself on his frustration.

Some men, to make sure of their potency, often begin to change sexual partners, and each time they have sexual intercourse with a new partner. This can occur in an unfavorable environment, when emotional stress is high, and this also contributes to premature ejaculation.

Sometimes a man, having tried all the methods of “potency testing” and making sure that he is “sexually disabled,” begins to avoid intimacy, refuses to communicate with women, ceases all communication, withdraws into himself and his feelings about sexual dysfunction. Many young men do not get married because of this, although it is regular and frequent sex life that could help them overcome this violation.

Some men do not want to delve into the essence of their frustration. Communicating with a specialist, they require only one thing – some “foreign” medicine, which will help them prolong. Well, just take it out and put this medicine for them, and as if by magic, everything will go right away with him.

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