How not to stay guilty in the absence of an orgasm in a woman?
Sexual arousal in a man arises much faster than in a woman – a man saw an erotic scene on TV, read an erotic novel or saw a naked woman in an erotic magazine – and a desire can flare up right away. And he demands from his constant sexual partner the immediate realization of his desire.
And a woman cannot “start from a half-turn”, like a man, and immediately go to meet his desire. Maybe at this moment her thoughts are completely different, she is upset or worried about something, and the cares of modern women have more than necessary. Not every woman can immediately switch from her problems to sexual ones.
Men believe that their demands for regular performance of “conjugal duty” are normal, but the same right, in their opinion, does not apply to wives. Therefore, the husband is indignant if the wife is “always little”, and she constantly “sticks” to her husband with the requirements of intimacy.
Perhaps, and not so often, the wife “pestering” her husband, but “pestering” precisely at the moment when the husband does not want intimacy. Or he does not satisfy her enough.
And when the opposite is true, and the husband at the wrong time inclines his wife to have sexual intercourse, moreover, very persistently, and is very offended and even angry if she refuses him, then this, from the position of a man, is normal.
The opinion that there are women in the world who are always ready for sexual contact is deeply mistaken. Women want intimacy exactly when they want it, and not when a man wants it.
Some women want sexual intercourse more often, others less often, but for them their own desire is no less important than the desire for intimate relationships for a man.
In matters of gender there is no dominant side. The husband can realize his strength, character and dominance in his social, professional or other activities, and when it comes to sex, then the interests of both parties are equal, and the man has no preemptive rights over women.
But a woman should take into account the interests of her sexual partner, going towards him, remembering that with long interruptions in sexual life, a man may decrease potency, and not allow such long interruptions if she is healthy.
Of course, the partner must also take into account the interests of women, women’s ailments or bad mood and not allow “voluntary rape”, which is often in married couples.
Many men have heard them say in a dismissive tone that his wife has some kind of gynecological disease. They don’t even try to understand which one, saying that the wife “is sick of something about women there”.
But if men had to change at least for a short time in this regard with a woman and experience what many women suffering from gynecological diseases have to experience, perhaps they would then change their neglect of female diseases.
Unfortunately, in our country, despite the loud slogans about the need to care for the health of women and children, in fact, the attitude to this problem leaves much to be desired.
No other country has as many abortions as ours. In other countries, abortion is an extraordinary event in the life of the whole family, not just women, and they treat it as a serious operation, the woman is in the clinic for several days, she is observed by gynecologists for a long time after the abortion in order to avoid complications.
There is no fault of our women in the presence of a large number of abortions. For many years, contraception (prevention of pregnancy) in our country was at such a primitive level, limited to mechanical means, ointments, or several hormonal drugs that cause many side effects – that our compatriots did not have the opportunity to protect themselves without damage to their health or sexual relations.
Many of our compatriots took the risk of becoming pregnant so as not to deprive a man of full sensations, and refused to use condoms.
If at least one man had experienced “live” abortion without anesthesia at least once in his life and told others about it, perhaps this could have made a big difference. And abortion without anesthesia in our country is a common occurrence.
And you know, dear men, that it is not so rare for a woman to be told by the medical staff of the gynecological departments when she screams in pain: “She knew how to live a sexual life, be able and tolerate!” Want to be in her place? After all, not only a woman lived a sexual life, but also her partner, and this serious suffering falls on only one woman.
Therefore, many women, experiencing fear of a possible pregnancy and the need for such a painful way to terminate it, cannot get rid of this fear during sexual intercourse, since none of the modern contraceptives provides an absolute guarantee. During coitus, women are constrained, tense, cannot relax and experience pleasure, which inevitably affects sexual arousal.
The lack of orgasm and the fear of becoming pregnant encourages many women to avoid sexual intimacy. Or they are forced to agree, only yielding to the partner, so as not to push him away with his refusal and not to lose, fearing that, being dissatisfied with her constant refusals, he will seek sexual satisfaction with other women. But during coitus, they do not feel pleasant sensations, but only wait intensely for it to end soon.
In addition, due to frequent abortions, almost every woman subsequently has many gynecological diseases – chronic adnexitis, cervicitis, and others. They occur with exacerbations when a woman experiences severe pain. And in this state, of course, no woman has any desire for intimacy. It is difficult in our country to find a woman over 25 years old who would not have problems with gynecology. And this is directly related to sexual problems.
There is no fault of women when they refuse sexual intimacy due to gynecological diseases. When our medicine reaches Western level, then, hopefully, we will have more healthy women who will be full-fledged sexual partners. And this is the care and duty of men – it is they in the government and parliament who allocate meager amounts for health care. So, the prospects for a successful resolution of this problem for our women are not yet in sight.
Therefore, a man must take into account purely female diseases and ailments, and not treat them with contempt or irritation due to the fact that a woman experiencing malaise and pain, again avoids sexual intercourse. And besides, it is the man who must take care that the partner does not have an unwanted pregnancy, which will require an abortion. What kind of contraception is suitable for this woman, the doctor should also recommend.
For a normal sex life, in addition to the above, the partner must take into account the sexual needs of women. This is in his interests.
Nothing excites a man so much as the look of a woman experiencing a real (and not demonstrated, feigned) orgasm. At the same time, the man himself has an orgasm much more intense.
In addition, it gives a man self-confidence, in his sexual abilities, if he gives pleasure to his partner.
If a woman experiences an orgasm every time with coitus, and even if not every time, but often enough, she will not shy away from sexual intimacy, since for her an orgasm is as much a pleasure as for a man, not so acute, but but longer.
No wonder the great Napoleon dreamed at least once in his life to experience the same orgasm as a woman.
And some women may experience several orgasms during one sexual intercourse.
If a woman constantly avoids intimate relationships, then one should not “blame it on a healthy person”, calling it “frigid”.
In most cases, it is the man who is to blame for the woman’s lack of excitement and lack of orgasm. Therefore, it is useful for a man to think about why the partner does not crave intimacy, but on the contrary, deviates from it.
If there is no stage of preliminary sexual caresses, then for such a short period of time that sexual intercourse itself lasts, the woman does not have time to get so excited as to experience an orgasm. This time is not enough even for swelling and elasticity of her genitals, their moistening with a secret (lubricant) secreted by special glands, and a woman may experience pain during intercourse.
Even if a woman pretends that she is having an orgasm, groans and groans, any experienced man will always determine whether this is true or just an imitation. With an orgasm in women, there is a rhythmic peristaltic contraction of the muscles of the vagina, uterus and even the muscles of the abdominals, and it is impossible not to notice this.
Although, of course, most women, like men, do not remain silent during orgasm, however, they roll up in a piercing scream, beat for half an hour in convulsions and only bite into the partner’s nails with tantrums or women imitating an orgasm in order to give the partner pleasure in this “performance” and give it confidence that he is a “real man.”
A normal man, interested in his partner, is able to ensure that a woman goes to meet his desire, even if five minutes ago she did not think about sexual intimacy.